MANILA -- "I'm not saying that he's a bad person. He was a bad boyfriend to me."
This was Bea Alonzo's candid sharing about her former boyfriend, actor Mico Palanca, in her interview published in YES! magazine's July 2013 issue.
Five years after their break-up in 2008, the 25-year-old actress openly recalled why their relationship "had to end," enumerating numerous incompatibilities between them.
The couple started getting acquainted when they co-starred in the 2002 series "K2BU," and later the primetime series "It Might Be You," which aired the following year.
"Four years niya ako niligawan. Awa ng Diyos hindi rin naman siya nag-work," Alonzo said, pointing to their 10-year age gap as among the reasons.
Age gap
At the time Palanca started courting her, the teenaged Alonzo was only starting to establish herself as an actress. Her suitor, in contrast, wasn't particularly passionate with the craft, according to Alonzo.
"Hindi talaga kami magkaintindihan. He was so much older than I was, so iba 'yung priorities niya. Iba siya magtrato. Ayoko naman kasing magsalita nang masama tungkol sa kanya, but it wasn't a good relationship.
"Like, iba siya towards work, iba ako twoards work. Ako, passion ko 'to. Siya, he wants it for the money. So hindi niya ko naiintindihan," she said.
Coming off the success of her team-up with John Lloyd Cruz in "Kay Tagal Kang Hinintay" in 2002, Alonzo hit a stride in her career to become one of the most sought after leading ladies of her generation.
But Palanca, according the actress, didn't seem proud of her achievements even as they became a couple.
"Everytime I felt na may na-aachieve ako, I should be proud of it, parang... Ayokong magsalita ng... Gusto ko 'yong pamilya niya. But 'yon, parang feeling ko, hindi ako naggo-grow as a person.
"Parang na-achieve ko 'to, 'I should be proud of this, pero bakit hindi ka masaya for me?' Or parang ano, hindi niya 'ko pwedeng panoorin sa successes ko, kasi hindi pa siya nagsa-succeed? Parang gano'n," she said.
'Nosebleed'
Aside from her their apparent mismatch in terms of career, Alonzo said she often felt out of place in Palanca's "world" -- which she also referred to as a reason why their relationship couldn't seem to work.
She also recalled being particularly bothered that she couldn't get along with his friends, and him with hers.
"Madami kaming issues, madami. We'd always drink, 'yong mga ganyan, and it wasn't my world. Like, I don't like to go out. Tapos iba 'yong friends niya.
"Like ito, ha, when you're in a relationship -- I don't like to compare, pero 'yong friends ni Z, friends ko lahat, and they reached out para maging friends ko. So parang feeling ko, ito 'yong normal na relationship," Alonzo said, referring to her current boyfriend, actor Zanjoe Marudo.
She added: "Back then 'yong friends niya (Palanca), hindi ko friends. Iyong, they are just my friends because I was with him. It's not like, 'Lalabas tayo without him.' 'Yong ganon. Tapos, he didn't want to be friends with my friends kasi he thought na parang, 'Ay, mga bata 'yan, mga...' Saka hindi sila kasing sosyal, 'yong mga friends ko, 'yong mga ganon."
Alonzo laughed when the term "nosebleed" was brought up, admitting she wasn't used to conversing in English as much as Palanca was with his group of friends.
"Ay talaga, nosebleed ako sa lahat ng mga ano nila! Kaya siguro hindi rin sila mayadong nagri-reachout sa akin, kasi nosebeled talaga ako sa mundo nila," she said.
Insecurities
Although the actress recalled Palanca's family always treating her kindly, she admitted to be left wanting in terms of her boyfriend's attention.
At the time, Alonzo said she was dealing with many insecurities, and somehow didn't find the much-needed encouragement from her own boyfriend.
"Baka kailangan niya ng mas pasensiyosang babae or something. Baka I loved myself more at that point. I needed to love myself more kasi, alam mo, totoo no'ng time na 'yon, I didn't think I was pretty. Iniisip ko, ang taba ko. Ang dami kong insecurities, 'yong mga gano'n.
"Eventually no'ng nakawala na 'ko doon sa mga ganong pag-iisip, ang mali ko lang, mali lang 'yong man na minahal ko,'" she said.
Recounting all the issues in their relationship, Alonzo said, "That's why it had to end.
